Today, BDSM has become more popular than ever, and part of its appeal is its somewhat taboo nature, which makes it even more exciting and erotically stimulating.
Examples of the popularity of BDSM are everywhere in popular entertainment, books, and the media today, such as in the great success of Fifty Shades of Grey, soon to become a major motion picture, and the top selling songs and albums by Miley Cyrus, Madonna, and other singers who use the role play of a dominatrix in their videos.
So what exactly is BDSM, who likes it, and why? In a nutshell, the B stands for bondage, where one partner ties up or restrains another with everything from ropes to chains and handcuffs.
The “D” stands for “domination” where one partner dominates another in a power exchange and enjoys that charge of power, while the other likes being powerless.
The S stands for submission and sadism, where one partner “punishes” or “tortures” another, such as by using whips and restraints, while the other “submits” and enjoys the experience, because this is just fantasy play, not real punishment or torture, like in a jail or prison.
And finally the “M” stands for “masochism,” where the person who submits may enjoy experiencing pain or being put down and humiliated within certain limits in a fantasy play.
The appeal of this play cross-cuts all social, economic, and ethnic groups, though what may differ is the type of play and the equipment used. For example, some participants may enjoy using all kinds of special equipment and may create elaborate scenes to enact in a role play, whereas others may use limited equipment and few words. While some may like going out in nature to play, others may like to go to dungeons or create their own in their basement.
And the reason this BDSM role play is so appealing? Because it enables people to create and step into their own alter ego personae, like actors taking on a role in an ever changing performance, which is what keeps these role play scenes so exciting.
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Want to learn more? Charlayne E. Grenci, Ph.D., aka Mistress Carla can be your teacher & mentor. She provides instruction in the dynamics and activities for BDSM fantasy play. Among her popular topics are: how to dress the role; the proper protocol or code of rules; dealing with the dangers and risks, including the use of safe words, and the illegal practices to avoid; acceptable and non-acceptable behavior and more.
Dr. Grenci has been a professional and lifestyle dominant and human sexuality educator and sex coach for over 30 years.
