Category: Misc
My Introduction to the Spiritual World
My non-conformist years of rebellion were starting to take a toll on me. I was still refined at heart but remarkably immature. I was about to enter a world which would conflict with everything I had been taught as a child and all the values which were inbred in me. Had I also been programmed for alternative lifestyles? Up through my twenties I was still quite naive in some respects, and I surely wasn’t aware there was an underground subculture which would defy all the principles of my childhood up-bringing, as well as challenge my character and community status. By all social norms, this new lifestyle, this new profession would mock that old-fashioned ideology and all the disciplines and protocol that went with it. It must have been in the cards? Soon, I would become known as a Professional Dominatrix. I would be asked if I was a witch or a fortune teller. I would also been referred to as “the Larry Flint” of the BDSM community. What most people didn’t know is that around the time of this complex transition in 1979, I experienced a spiritual awakening which was quite confusing. I really didn’t know what was happening at… Continue reading
Dungeon VS. Clinic: The Origin of My Non-Conventional Research Project
It was amazing in those early days, when people met me and heard what I did for a living; they became anxiously interested in seeking my advice about their personal sex lives. This happened on a regular basis in and out of the dungeon. Everywhere I went and most everyone I met became curious and started inquiring, probing…. I felt I was “on stage” wherever I was, but I didn’t have a problem sharing my knowledge, nor did the subject of “sex” embarrass me. It seemed everybody had questions or issues about their relationship or sex life. Most mainstream people were not familiar with the subculture I was involved with, but they knew it dealt with sexuality and that is what caught their interest. Discussions with strangers and acquaintances quickly became as frequent and popular as with my personal friends and fetish enthusiasts. Whenever I divulged my taboo occupation to family doctors, I was asked to stay and chat with them after my appointment. Predictably, they all wanted to be enlightened on the subject of domination and submission and what went on in the dungeon. Who were my clients and what did they ask for? I gladly obliged, because I… Continue reading
Peek Inside the Mind of Mistress Carla, ‘Queen of Domination’
Do You Know a Highly Creative Personality? Is it a Blessing or a Curse? Because of a paradox personality, highly creative people appear as numerous people within one individual possessing a wide range of extreme and intense energies. I think of it as a yin-yang personality. These people possess the deepest of insights. Needing a lot of sleep and solitude for their creative production, but needing equally as much socializing with other people. That doesn’t sound too out of the ordinary, but with the highly creative folks, it gets much more complicated than that. It is common to question how a person’s traits can be so opposite at the same time, such as a combination of intelligence and naivety. What about tremendous self-confidence and insecurity? One trait appears to conflict with the other. I will eagerly challenge the unknown and at the same time take pride in being a problem-solver. I have been called a visionary, labeled a leader, a trendsetter and a trail blazer, because I take the challenges, the heat and the risks of being rejected or accepted for experimenting and exploring new territory and new concepts. I have a passion to play hard, work hard and… Continue reading
A SNEEK PREVIEW OF MY BOOK, ‘QUEEN OF DOMINATION’
Epilogue Flashback to 1981, The Story Unfolds It is July 2012. I am at home sitting in my quaint office-library and surrounded by books. I take a deep breath. My pulse starts racing, and I wonder where did all the time go? What happened to the last thirty plus years of my life? Why did it speed by so quickly? Is this where I’m supposed to be in my life now, or should I be engaged in something else before it’s too late? I glance to the left side of my desk and notice the famous Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy staring at me, stabbing at my gut. I feel a nauseating rush and all at once I am irritated and envious. Those were my books to write. After all, I have lived that life. My office hugs me in a sphere of tall, fully stuffed bookcases of non-fiction literature containing some of the most intense and extreme educational texts. How- to sex manuals, books on psychology, abnormal psychology, human sexuality, sexology, personality disorders, perversions, fetishes, other paraphilias, relationship self-help manuals, books on alternative lifestyles, gender-bending, criminal behavior, and even a few tomes about serial killers and the mafia. To… Continue reading
Our ‘Earth Angels’
Part I – Cruelty of Aging Aging… after 50 or 60, after 70 or 80 years old? It is not a situation the majority wishes to recognize, and it is not a pleasant journey for others which is why discussions are often avoided. I am going to write this from the heart. I have had the experience of feeling the intensity of pain, anguish and confusion from elderly relatives, clients, patients and friends. I have seen the look in their eyes, the expressions on their face, the tone of voice, yet at the same time their words were saying something else. Their words were not exposing this silent anguish. There words would not dare speak of the submerged pain. Why, I said to myself and then pondered the answer? Why would someone rather suffer in silence than share these feelings, especially with someone close… someone who cares. Wouldn’t it relieve some of the anguish? Why is suffering in silence so prevalent. It’s a cruel reality. The answer is as complex as it is heart-wrenching. Nobody in their right mind wants to be thought of as weak or helpless, insecure or scared? What about crazy? Does anyone want a… Continue reading